Road to hell

12 December 2007


As I walked to work I mentally composed this post. It was to be full of rage and bile; hatred spewing forth. Red in tooth and claw. There was to be angry words, four-lettered ones at that, screams of frustration.

And all because of those free newspapers.

Well, more to do with the way the giver-outers of the newspapers have developed the habit of stepping slightly into your path and forcing you to swerve to avoid smashing in to them. I’ve no problem with ignoring the “Free morning Metro” pleas. I don’t read them so I see no point in taking them. I don’t want one and that is that.

So I intended to moan and gripe and bitch about them and the annoyance that they are. I mean, if I wanted a paper I’d take one, right? So you getting in my face is really not going to have any impact, unless, of course, I smack you on the nose. That’d have an impact.

That was to have been the subject of my blog today. Fucking free-newspaper-giver-outers and their irritating ways. But then I got to work. And it was lovely and quiet. Most of the exams are over, the students are gone away, and there was cake. And now I have a lovely cup of tea, and lo, all is right with the world again.


I know what you are thinking, that the post title is to do with the road I walk to work, and I suppose it is, a little, but it fits even more, on account of the whole good intentions, and the intent I earlier had. Man, i is a fricking genius.
Or just lame. Either works.

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8 Responses

  1. In the dart station I never took a paper from the herald am guy, who would then bitch about me because i didn't take one and say good morning, and i'd be able to hear him whilst buying my ticket. thankfully he seems to have stopped working there now!

  2. Kelly says:

    Fency, this sentence made me smile: "Most of the exams are over, the students are gone away, and there was cake. " And there was cake, the answer to ALL our problems, and I'm not even kidding. Plus, tea.

  3. Megan says:

    Wow, I couldn't agree more with you about the annoyance that is the "free newspaper giver-outer." I have since moved to a place where there is no such problem, but in the city where I was living, there were two types of free newspapers each with their own staff of giver-outers which made it even worse as they would stand right next to each other and try to outdo each other and force you to take their paper instead of the other guy's…even though, if I had to take a free paper, I probably would have preferred the other guy's paper. *sigh*

  4. Carl V. says:

    Quiet and a good warm beverage certainly can calm the spirit! I enjoyed your not-quite-a-rant post! ;)

  5. Fence says:

    @ TGWAOF: Who does he think he is that he thinks he is owed a Good Morning for annoying people. he should be thankful he doesn't get a punch on the nose.

    @ Kelly: *in the ott hyperbolic style of a Trailer Voice-Over Dude* Cake, the ONLY solution

    @ Megan: yup, totally, having two competing free papers makes it so much worse, because you dance around one only to bump into the other. I hatessess them.

    @ Carl: errr, tea, the OTHER solution ;)

  6. jean pierre says:

    haha fence! this isn't the first time you've written about those free newspaper people…! :D

    i personally like that idea of getting a badge or a sign or a sticker on your forehead, letting them know about your need (or lack of) for one of those papers. something like "no thank you. mother fucker."

  7. Fence says:

    @ JP: I know, but they really can be annoying, and so deserve another post :)

  8. jean pierre says:

    oh, i agree! thats why i was laughing.

    and sympathising.